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He’s sitting at the corner of the bar surrounded on all sides with people jostling just to get with earshot of him. He’s the guy that everyone wants to know and to be around.

A lot of guys assume being well liked man is just something you either have or don’t have but this is a mistake. You too can become a likeable person by adapting the right mindset and mannerisms.

Here are 6 Things Likable People do differently:

They Remember Everybody’s Name

likeable person

In his classic book How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie says that “Names are the sweetest and most important sound in any language.”

In order to build rapport with someone it is absolutely essential to remember that person’s name. A person’s name is such a strong part of their identity, that if you don’t know their name then you cannot truly know them as a person.

Not only is remembering someone’s name in a conversation important, but it is also a good idea to repeatedly use their name in conversation. By doing this, it helps to accelerate the connection between two people because a person feels that they are recognized and appreciated when their name is used as opposed to a generic pronoun.

They’re Great Listeners 

Humans are by nature selfish creatures. We love to talk about ourselves, our accomplishments our problems and more. To take the time to actually listen and care what someone else has to say will make you stand out from your peers. Just as repeating someone’s name makes them feel special, giving them the chance to talk about themselves makes them feel special as well.

Being a great listener is about more than just shutting up. It’s about being an active listener too, which means that you are acknowledging what they’re saying, and enhancing the conversation by prompting them with more questions and comments.

Being a great listener is also about being respectful. When someone is trying to have serious conversation, you shouldn’t be clicking away on your smartphone or checking out the cute girl that walked by. Give all your attention to the person speaking.

They Exude Positivity

They say that we’re the product of the 5 people we spend the most time with. If someone wants to be successful and happy, they’re going to avoid negative people.

This is why people who exude positivity are never short on friends. These are the guys that everyone loves to be around and wants to be best friends with.

The world we live in abundant with negativity. Whether we watch in on TV, see it on our social media feeds, or hear problems from family and friends, negativity always seems to find its way into our lives. Despite this, we are not doomed to be negative. In fact, people who are positive are so because they have optimistic views of their lives and their future.

If you want to be this type of guy, be the voice of positivity in a world of negativity. Don’t complain, don’t pout. Always have a smile on your face and do what you can to improve the lives of others.

They Are Genuine

Surfing

Just as people loathe negativity and selfishness, they hate people who are dishonest and disingenuous. These people are often called ‘fake’.

The reason fake people are universally disliked is because of they are dishonest about their life they’re probably going to be dishonest about their intentions and beliefs. This always ends up creating headaches and unneeded drama for all parties involved. While some girls can get away with it, this is something all men seeking to be more likeable should avoid.

Being genuine is about portraying who you really are to the world. You should never try to pretend to be someone you’re not, but at the same time don’t hide your strengths and accomplishments.

They Don’t Judge People

When we surround ourselves with friends, we want to be able to confide in them our thoughts and feelings. We never want them to criticize or make fun of us and doing so is that fastest way to lose friends.

You’re never going to see or hear likeable people talking behind people’s backs, teasing them, or engaging in gossip.

Even if you are not overt about being judgmental, people can often sense when they are being judged. A roll of the eyes or a little snicker is enough to having people feel awful. Instead of looking down or criticizing others, realize that everyone is different This means that people are always going to have different thoughts and opinions, and they expect their friends to reconcile with those differences.

They Speak Clearly and Confident

Having excellent speaking skills is a core characteristic of likeable people. When someone is the life of a party or ‘working a room’, it’s hard to do so with a soft and timid voice. They make sure to talk loudly and clearly, enunciating all their words so that others can fully understand them. They also have a friendly tone, and don’t judge or lambast others when conversing.

In addition to being a clear speaker, these people also speak their minds. They don’t hide their true thoughts and dance around simple questions. They always mean what they say.

So there you have it, six tried and true characteristics of likeable men. Again while genetics may determine our personalities to an extent, by saying that you are not capable of becoming a likeable person is a limiting belief that you must shatter if you wish to become the type of guy people want to surround themselves with.

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Posted by Patrick Banks

Patrick Banks is a Berlin based dating and motivational coach . His passion is sharing his positive attitude and encouraging people to reach their highest potential to become the best versions of themselves. For weekly updates on dating, relationships and personal development check out his Wingman Magazine.

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