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Have you ever had the unfortunate situation of being in the corner of the room during a party, eating or drinking to provide yourself with something to do while you watch others converse and have fun? Are you sick of this happening to you, and wonder why no one talks to you? Or have you been in the situation where you are talking to someone, but they seem like they want to end the conversation, or just seem to not like you in general?

If any or all of these things have happened to you, you are not alone. In most cases, people can just be mean and rude, but many times it unfortunately has to do with your behavior, whether you realize it or not. Do not fret, however; all of these situations can turn around for you. Here are the best ways to up your game and make yourself more likeable. It’s easier than you may think.

Don’t take yourself too seriously

Nothing can be more of a buzzkill than being too serious in social situations. Being too serious can make people feel that they have to walk on eggshells just to make sure you don’t get upset, and that’s a sacrifice no one wants to make when all they want to do is have fun.

Tell jokes

Everyone likes a joker because jokers make people laugh, and making people laugh is one of the best ways to get people to want to hang out with you. Just make sure you don’t make jokes at the expense of others. Make jokes that poke fun at yourself. At the same time, too much self-deprecating humor can be a downer and turn people off. The key is to find a happy medium.

Eye contact

If you look into the eyes of the person you’re talking to, they’ll feel more connected and liked. When people feel liked, they’ll have an easier time liking the person that likes them.

Listen

When people feel that they are being listened to, they feel like their thoughts and ideas are valid, and they’ll be more open to sharing more with you in the future.

Avoid giving too much advice

Similar to listening, sometimes people just wish to vent their problems. They are not looking for advice, but rather someone to just listen.

Do not interrupt people

No one likes to be interrupted, period. If you don’t annoy people, you will be more likeable.

Smile

Smiling is a confidence booster for people because it makes them feel that they make people happy. It’s also contagious. Soon enough, they’ll smile back.

Ask questions

Many times, people make the mistake of talking too much. When you talk too much, especially about yourself, two things happen.

  • One: the other person starts to feel left out because you aren’t showing any interest in them.
  • Two: the other person starts to get bored. Once they realize they are not needed in the conversation, their mind will begin to drift. If you ask questions about the person you are talking to, it will give them opportunities to talk, and they’ll feel appreciated and cared about.

Do not be too self-absorbed

You’ll come off as someone who is conceited, snobby, and/or selfish. People tend to gravitate towards others that genuinely care about those around them.

Don’t care about others’ opinions

People can tell if what they say will take a heavy toll on you. They can tell if you care too much. In short, caring too much about what others think makes you seem needy. Try not to care about what others think. Not only will it make you more likeable, but it will also help you in all areas of life.

Don’t be clingy

People should feel liberated by the friendships and relationships they have. They shouldn’t feel as if they are being suffocated, even if they know the person involved does not mean to come across in this way. To avoid this, want the relationships you are seeking, but don’t need them.

Be respectful and polite

No one wants to be around people who do not give them the respect they deserve.

Be confident

Confidence is a very attractive thing to people, and it’s something people want to be around. If you are not confident, fake it until you make it.

Be happy

No one wants to be around a downer. People want friendships that make them happy and inspired.

Be yourself

Being yourself is one of the most important things to remember if you are looking to be more likable. People like being around genuine people. It will also be more validating for you that the person they like is you and not someone else, as well as inspiring them to be more genuine themselves. The friendship will be more rewarding as well.

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Posted by Igor Ovsyannykov

I'm a digital nomad and entrepreneur bouncing around South East Asia. When I'm not working here, I'm out taking photos or writing travel articles for Nipananlifestyle.com. Follow me on Instagram: @igorovsyannykov

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