80 Fantastic Questions to Ask a Girl Over Text

Last Updated on September 2, 2024

In the sublime words of the renowned poet and author David Whyte, “A real conversation always contains an invitation. You are inviting another person to reveal herself or himself to you, to tell you who they are or what they want.”

Many schools of thought agree with Whyte’s approach. They opine that the best conversations are open-ended and leave room for both parties to learn more about each other.

Due to the invitational nature of this form of conversation, both parties feel free to share personal details. As is often the case, one of the best ways to foster connections with people is by discovering more about them through conversations.

That said, striking conversations with people isn’t the easiest of tasks. This task becomes even more challenging when you’re romantically interested in the person. Couple that with this dynamic and technologically driven world we live in, and you have a recipe for disaster.

As we find ourselves in this technological haven of a planet, it is becoming increasingly difficult to hold meaningful conversations with people. An innovation like texting meant to make conversations more accessible and meaningful has only achieved the former.

Some philosophers even go as far as calling texting a barrier to fostering connections. However, I’m going to show you how to turn this “barrier” into a steppingstone.

Talking to a girl you have feelings for is arguably one of the most fantastic yet intimidating experiences you may ever have, especially if this is someone you genuinely like. A ton of things may be rushing through your mind, coupled with fears that you might not have anything in common. Here’s the thing.

Nearly every guy or girl struggles to strike up a conversation with someone they find attractive. As with most fears, the best way to approach it is head-on. However, most people aren’t comfortable with this. To solve this, the best way to start is through text.

After the necessary introductions have been made, the common pitfall of most people is that either their questions are too casual or too personal. Yes, questions are a great way to keep a conversation going. However, if they are asked too repetitively, it appears more like an interview or an interrogation. That isn’t a great feeling to experience.

As such, I’ve specially curated a list of fantastic questions to take you a step further to becoming an outstanding conversationalist. Remember that these questions are just frameworks to help you get to know people better. They serve as the perfect backup plan if the conversation is headed down a boring path.

Before I let you go on your illustrious journey of texting escapades, there are a few things I’d like you to remember.

• This Is Real Life, Not A Speed Run

Don’t speed through the questions. Remember that this is a conversation, not an interrogation. Building connections takes time and effort from both sides. To each question you ask, listen carefully to the response, and build upon it.

• Context Vs Content

Regardless of the merit in whatever you are saying, the fallback could be disastrous if your content is taken out of context. You wouldn’t want to appear unconcerned by asking unrelated and random questions with no context whatsoever. As such, make sure that each question builds upon the last conversation or takes a smooth turn at the very least.

• It Takes Two to Tango

Every successful conversation involves commitment and participation from all parties involved. Don’t sit and ask a million questions; involve yourself too. As your questions are answered, follow up with your own experiences and encounters. As this goes on, she may even start to ask you questions as well. This action fosters connections as both of you get to know more about each other.

Now, without further ado, here are eighty exciting questions to ask a girl over text.

1. What three things always make you smile?
2. What would you say if I asked you out for dinner?
3. What do you look for in a guy?
4. What gives you butterflies in your stomach?
5. What does “love” mean to you?
6. Have you ever told someone who is not a family member that you love them?
7. What did you think of me when you first saw me?
8. What is the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for you?
9. What makes you feel beautiful?
10. How would you describe yourself?
11. What do you like to do to relax?
12. What are your plans for the next 24 hours?
13. Do you prefer going out or having a relaxing night indoors?
14. How can you tell when a guy is interested in you?
15. How important are your friends’ opinions about your relationships?
16. What is something that would make you instantly fall in love with someone?
17. How would you react if I told you that I like you?
18. What do you like most about me?
19. Who should make the first move, the guy or the girl?
20. What’s more important: personality or looks?
21. What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done for someone you had a crush on?
22. What are the three most important things about a relationship?
23. If we spent an entire day together, what would we do?
24. Do you prefer texting or talking on the phone?
25. What are the things on your bucket list?
26. What is your favourite book?
27. What fictional character do you identify the most with? Why?
28. What moment(s) in your life would you love to relive?
29. Do you prefer to be noticed or to blend in?
30. If you could meet any historical person, who would you choose?
31. Are you good at making decisions?
32. How do you want others to see you?
33. What movie could you watch over and over again?
34. Do you prefer being with other people or being alone?
35. What cheers you up when you’re feeling sad?
36. What is the most significant change you’ve ever made?
37. Do you keep a journal?
38. What is the best advice your parents ever gave you?
39. Who was your best friend growing up?
40. What is something you have always wanted to do but have been too afraid to do?
41. Where did you grow up? Did you like it?
42. What is your family like?
43. What is one fear you have?
44. What is your favourite TV show?
45. What is something you often get asked that you wish people would stop asking you?
46. What is something silly that creeps you out?
47. Do you make rash judgements about people, or do you get to know them first?
48. What is something you didn’t do that you wish you had?
49. When does time pass quickly for you, and when does it pass slowly?
50. What do you wish you knew more about?
51. If you could choose between being a dog with three legs or a horse with five legs, which would you choose?
52. Someone offers you a million dollars. If you take it, you have an evil snail following you for the rest of your life. That snail’s only desire is to kill you, and that snail cannot be killed. Do you take the million dollars?
53. What weird food combinations do you enjoy?
54. If you were an actress, what kind of movies would you star in?
55. If you could pull hotdogs out of your belly button, how much would you charge people for them?
56. What is something that you believed for a long time that you should have realized wasn’t true?
57. What is the worst pickup line you’ve ever heard?
58. What is the weirdest thing you’ve ever had on a sandwich?
59. What is the funniest conversation you have ever overheard?
60. Would you punch me in the face for $1,000?
61. If you were reincarnated, what would you come back as?
62. What cartoon do you still like to watch?
63. What was your most embarrassing moment?
64. If you could hang out with one member of the Avengers, who would you choose?
65. Have you ever broken any bones?
66. If you had to choose between looking like a fish or smelling like a fish, which would you choose?
67. What would people hear if they could read your mind?
68. Tell me your favourite joke.
69. What animated character do you have a crush on?
70. Would you rather drink a gallon of ketchup or a gallon of pickle juice?
71. What is the strangest fear that you have?
72. What is the craziest argument you’ve ever had?
73. If money was no obstacle, what is one thing you would purchase?
74. What is something that you are bad at?
75. What is something that you are especially good at?
76. What do you find most annoying?
77. Do you prefer sweet or savoury foods?
78. Would you rather go a day without your phone or a day without toilet paper?
79. What is the worst fight you’ve ever been in?
80. If you could choose between flying or being able to hold your breath underwater, which would you choose?

Ultimately, these questions, like most tips in life, are just tools. Remember that the true conversationalist is you, not these questions. They only provide an avenue to strike up the conversation. The success of the discussion is entirely up to you and your personality. As common as it may sound, it would be best if you kept it real. Feel free to be open-minded but don’t compromise your values just to get someone to like you.

In the fullness of time, the path to becoming an outstanding conversationalist will lead you to foster connections with diverse people. That proposition, in its entirety, is utterly thrilling. To this end, I leave you with the wise words of John Green. “In the best conversations, you don’t even remember what you talked about, only how it felt. It felt like we were in some place your body can’t visit, some place with no ceiling and no walls and no floor and no instruments.”