Last Updated on July 13, 2020
We all have, at some point of time, felt the need of taking help. However, most of us would rather do the task ourselves, than asking someone else to do it. Though this sort of hesitation is universally forfended, especially for the people who are aspiring to become a leader, the reason behind it is a genuine one – fear of rejection.
Most of the potential leaders who shun taking help, have their reluctance sourced out of this apprehension. But the whole situation is entirely solvable, simply by making people help you willingly. In fact, by using a few psychological techniques, you can easily induce anyone to do your work, without any motivation, and that too voluntarily.
1. Be Attentive
Understand their Biases
Try to pay attention to small things that may descry the hidden bias of the person. Biases are not entirely bad things; one may have prejudices set on moral grounds, that definitely are not fallacious. Nevertheless, understanding both kind (good ones and bad ones) of cognitive biases of a person is imperative to create a clear picture of his/her thinking process.
Know about their goals
These goals may include the usual academic aims, or the financial ones, but the key here is to discern their deeper and tender desires. Usually, these ambitions are of subtle nature like spending time with young kids, to have a mountain adventure, or to be able to fight their phobias, etc., but ofttimes people have denser ardors like being a top sportsperson or businessperson. Knowing these profound motives of a person enables you to have a more candid relationship with them. Moreover, you may also modulate your request in a way that makes the task productive for the person too.
Comprehend their predilections
Before asking a favor from someone, it is important to know whether they have any preconception against the idea. For example, you may not ask someone ‘Do my Assignment’ who has an ethical predisposition. To get the idea about a person’s predilection, you may-
- Pay attention to the points that creates an impassioned reaction from them. It could be anything from political views to religious prejudices.
- Try to have a candid conversation with them, but remember your role in such communication is that of a listener.
- Notice their expressions when someone else is talking to them. It will show how socially comfortable they are.
Once you know that they would not have any prejudice against the task, you may move forward to become chummier with them.
2. Give Them Rational Advice
Put them at ease
It is imperative to be on the point of affability with the person(s), before you may ask for any favor. The best ‘do’ here is to empathize with them, and the critical ‘don’t’ is to make fun of them. Acts of kindness, light humor, too, may help you in this cause. Try to rise their confidence level by sharing your own trivial yet personal issues. It would be better if you share slightly embarrassing experiences with them, this will automatically make them more comfortable in your presence, because by then the wall of awkwardness may have crumbled to pieces.
Make them speak their mind
Once you have set the person at ease then assume the part of an eager and, most importantly, bona fide listener. Be genuinely attentive when they are discussing about their innermost feelings. And never jest about their philosophies, as most people are hypersensitive about them. All in all, you are required to create a humble environment for them, where they can easily voice their opinion without the fear of embarrassment.
Give them honest suggestions
While giving them any sort of advice, be entirely sincere. In such discussions, you should always be in an impartial state of mind. Not a shadow of ulterior motive should affect your consultation. Undisguised and virtuous advice increases your trustworthiness. And more trusted a person is, more are the chances of him getting accepted as a leader.
3. Use Reciprocity for Your Benefit
Understand the concept of interdependence
The ideology of interdependence is a must-know for you. In fact, interdependence is one among the most proclaimed ideas of many historical leaders. Albeit, the idea seems quite contrary to that of independence, which has now become an adnoun for leadership. However, this is not the case. An independent person may have the potential for becoming a great leader, but the actual great leader is the one that focuses more on interdependence.
Be genuinely helpful
If you really wish to be able to make people work voluntarily for you, then you have to create a likable image of yours, and the best way to achieve this is by being genuinely helpful. If it requires, you should even go out of your way to assist them. Found someone bullying a newcomer? Assertively take action against it, saw a colleague grappling with some technical snag, you can fix, go there and help him. There’s nothing like getting an unexpected help, when you need it the most.
Don’t be overenthusiastic
Though being helpful is really nice, being excessively enthusiastic about it, is not so. In any case, extremity is never a good thing. Moreover, it is observed that people often likes it better to voice their problems out loud, have them heard, and brainstorm about it, without ever being interested in finding the solution. It is better to let such people talk their frustration out, and offer your help only when you find it desired.
4. Get to The Point
Do not try assertion
Remember you want them to work voluntarily for you, and assertion is for commands. Furthermore, it is even observed that assertive statements often trigger the reverse psychology. Such circumstances are not only counter-productive for your cause, but may also ruin your image forever, ceasing all the prospects of ever taking voluntary help from the person.
Make your idea theirs
This is the gist of all the leadership technique and can only be explained effectively through example. Assume that you’re dealing with a problem of which you have already found the solution, but its implementation is something you cannot achieve all by yourself. Then call in a meeting, or simply discuss the problem, not the solution, with the person(s) from whom you seek help. Create such arguments that may lead them to the conclusion you’ve already had in your mind, without revealing anything of the sort. The key is to make people believe that the said suggestion is their own, so that they may feel connected to the idea on a more personalized level, enabling them to work harder for it.
Appreciate their efforts
Appreciation is very powerful tool. As they say, ‘A person who feels appreciated will always do more than what is expected.’, and there is not an ounce of myth in this saying. Don’t you ever had a supervisor who was always appreciative of people, and do you remember what was the general opinion about him? Did you not use to work harder for him, despite any external motivation factor? This is the power of appreciation, and de facto, this is the aptness you require.
Since you now know all the tactics of leadership, so should we await a future leader?